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perfect anger control

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mnj   United States. Apr 05 2013 23:20. Posts 3848
how do you conquer emotions???

the situation im about to talk about is extremely trite and silly.

i was playing dota2, i first picked QoP and went mid. 2nd pick invoker came mid and wanted mid. i already bought my items etc, i usually like to not respond, since all it does is escalate the situation.

i farmed bottle in the first 2 min, standard and he took my bottle of courrier and jacked it.

i asked for it back for about 5 min, before leaving. i never got upset during the game or yelled or capslock etc, but i felt really angry inside.

like EXTREMELY angry.

i tried to logically talk to myself that it was just a game, and that a single game of dota2 has absolutely no meaning/significance etc.

took me like a good 5 minutes to logically regain my cool

but how do i forgo that initial response of anger?

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hiems   United States. Apr 05 2013 23:32. Posts 2979

I doubt day to day stuff would work. Things like age couple years, new job, win lotto will work but normal day to day stuff? I dont think so based on you said you were extremely angry.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

player999   Brasil. Apr 05 2013 23:56. Posts 7978

just remember that pretty much nothing in life actually matters, X time from now this thing that is making you angry now won't anymore, and it's because it never mattered anyway

Browsing through your hand histories makes me wonder that you might not be aware these games are possibly play money. Have you ever tried to cash out? - Kapol 

mnj   United States. Apr 06 2013 00:18. Posts 3848

yeh, that's pretty much the same logical steps i try and go through, but is there a way to condition yourself, to minimize if not delete that initial anger response?

is there a way to skip it all together?


TheHuHu3   United States. Apr 06 2013 00:32. Posts 5544

If you've ever played Heroes of Newerth with FrinkX, this is what he would have done 100%.

TheHuHu4 coming soon :) 

player999   Brasil. Apr 06 2013 00:33. Posts 7978

there's also always the "could be worse" line

for me I think it was poker that completely removing my emotions towards money variance made it translate to life variance aswell

Browsing through your hand histories makes me wonder that you might not be aware these games are possibly play money. Have you ever tried to cash out? - Kapol 

hiems   United States. Apr 06 2013 00:55. Posts 2979


  On April 05 2013 23:33 player999 wrote:
there's also always the "could be worse" line

for me I think it was poker that completely removing my emotions towards money variance made it translate to life variance aswell



lol if you see my first post I'm skeptical of somehow training yourself to not be angry but seeing some of your graphs I can legit believe some people are pretty insane at doing something like that. crazy!

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

player999   Brasil. Apr 06 2013 01:07. Posts 7978

its not so much training as it is getting used to it

and you get used to it in poker (well I guess by putting yourself into this position, you are indeed training), and then it translates to other aspects of your life

I pretty much never get mad @ life stuff, like crashing my car, ripping my leg's ligaments, or anything, in the end if you think about it is never a big deal and it could always be worse

Browsing through your hand histories makes me wonder that you might not be aware these games are possibly play money. Have you ever tried to cash out? - KapolLast edit: 06/04/2013 01:08

TalentedTom    Canada. Apr 06 2013 01:34. Posts 20070


  On April 05 2013 23:32 TheHuHu3 wrote:
If you've ever played Heroes of Newerth with FrinkX, this is what he would have done 100%.



hi huhu

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us and as we let our own lights shine we unconsciously give other people permision to do the same 

mnj   United States. Apr 06 2013 02:07. Posts 3848


  On April 05 2013 23:32 TheHuHu3 wrote:
If you've ever played Heroes of Newerth with FrinkX, this is what he would have done 100%.



i was lucky to play with him once

played against him a few times though


Naib   Hungary. Apr 06 2013 05:26. Posts 968

Quit that shit cuz it's like a drug, problem solved.

My favourite line is Bet/Fold. I bet, you fold. 

Oly   United Kingdom. Apr 06 2013 07:44. Posts 3585


  On April 05 2013 22:20 mnj wrote:
how do you conquer emotions???



Don't! I think experienced poker players become conditioned in their thinking to disallow emotional reactions to situations, as it is a hugely necessary and difficult skill in poker, and that then leaks in to one's approach to the rest of life as it becomes habituated; as if life should be analysed in terms of cold logical EV. Sure, your anger is a problem when it is out of control, but it is quite natural to get angry when you get screwed over. Let it out imo.

Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated. 

Oly   United Kingdom. Apr 06 2013 07:50. Posts 3585


  On April 06 2013 00:07 player999 wrote:
its not so much training as it is getting used to it

and you get used to it in poker (well I guess by putting yourself into this position, you are indeed training), and then it translates to other aspects of your life

I pretty much never get mad @ life stuff, like crashing my car, ripping my leg's ligaments, or anything, in the end if you think about it is never a big deal and it could always be worse



My post above is opposing exactly this. For me I don't want to be this cold about life. Not having a go at you player999, I know nothing about you, you may just be a chilled guy, whatever, I don't intend to do the popular internet psychological diagnosis from a few lines of text thing, but many people in poker aim for what you have described above as a sanitized disengagement, which I think is a shame.

Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated.Last edit: 06/04/2013 07:51

player999   Brasil. Apr 06 2013 09:12. Posts 7978


  On April 06 2013 06:44 Oly wrote:
but it is quite natural to get angry when you get screwed over. Let it out imo.



It's natural but it isn't the most healthy and optimal reaction to these situations. There are better responses than anger.

Browsing through your hand histories makes me wonder that you might not be aware these games are possibly play money. Have you ever tried to cash out? - Kapol 

Oly   United Kingdom. Apr 06 2013 09:25. Posts 3585

Of course, it's a question of balance.

Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated. 

goose58   United States. Apr 06 2013 09:48. Posts 871

stop caring


dnagardi   Hungary. Apr 06 2013 11:14. Posts 1776

anger is a gift
embrace it


Highcard   Canada. Apr 06 2013 12:19. Posts 5428

the reason why anger is a poor emotion is it ties into high blood pressure. Feel that seething rage, pulsing through your body. That is not something you want to feel all the time and having a way to reduce or deflect is more optimal. Mostly since it is a state almost always brought on mentally it can be controlled through mental preparedness. I have no idea how you think about things or whatever, but what player999 said is a mental projection of 1 form of reality. Sometimes saying fuck it, won't matter helps, other times that causes it to get worse because who cares what happens now "go crazy". Another, is mental awareness. Being aware this is a physiological state brought on from you. So, because of that meditation actually helps. You can do active meditation. Should help.

Another thing is, if you have poor sleep quality/schedules, poor diet, poor fitness, dehydation Those can all throw your body out of balance, making less optimal reactions to stimuli

I have learned from poker that being at the table is not a grind, the grind is living and poker is how I pass the time 

gawdawaful   Canada. Apr 06 2013 14:44. Posts 9012

you play poker right? just bluff and be like bro almost done 5 more mins
if nothing else he wont jack your first courier

Im only good at poker when I run good 

traxamillion   United States. Apr 06 2013 16:26. Posts 10468

I dont play this game so I dont know what is allowed (i play real wc3 RTS not the custom game spinoffs so if anyone wants to play some wc3 HU let me know, pretty sure im the best player in north america at this point.) but what you need to do is start playing for the other team instantly. If possible the best thing to do would be to instantly start TKing him. Block him. Give your items to the enemy. Start killing your own main and ALt tab. Show him you have other shit to do but you will happily waste his time. ruin the game, lol at him, then bounce.


 
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