Some random stuff. Funny/Amazing

New to LiquidPoker? Register here for free!

Forum Index > Poker Blogs

legendofxix Canada. Jan 18 2007 21:35. Posts 242

Bird vs Jetplane. Guess who wins. Pics

Heres some marriage humour:

Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Golfing 3.6.
I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....
_____________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.
You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command C:APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 .
However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !
WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

0 votes

No-one remains a virgin. Life fucks everyone.

TheGuru Sweden. Jan 19 2007 02:39. Posts 532

Funny

There is no such thing as luck. There is only adequate or inadequate preparation to cope with a statistical universe. - Robert A. Heinlein (Time Enough for Love)

kantoiki Australia. Jan 20 2007 02:14. Posts 3818

not bad heh

muckv - i have an iq of 180 and i want someone to teach me how to take a shit IN the toilet.

chrusher97 Canada. Jan 20 2007 03:17. Posts 449

nice

Roald Tuvalu. Jan 21 2007 12:35. Posts 2683

yeah thats real funny till you actually get married

drugs, animals, children are welcome -Xavier

YoMeR United States. Jan 21 2007 19:36. Posts 12438

noice.

eZ Life.