Is Poker Pissing On You?

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JonnyCosMo United States. Feb 19 2007 16:12. Posts 7292

I've always used this metaphor to help describe what kind of personalities play poker. Different people handle bad situations differently. And lets face it, there are a lot of bad situations in poker. So the question of the day is:

What do you do when poker starts pissing on you?

Imagine the following: You are standing in some random spot. At the same time, there is a man who is on top of a ladder, pants around his ankles and using what the good lord gave him to release the golden shower on top of your head. Yes he is pissing on you. So what is your course of action?

The Bankroll Nit - He doesn't like getting pissed on for the obvious reasons. But he lacks the balls to do anything about it. In response to getting pissed on, he simply moves out of the way. The poker equivalent to this would be someone who plays it safe, if they can't beat a game they move down and grind until they feel it's safe to move back up and tackle the higher stakes. This guy often uses the 100 buy-in rule to justify taking a shot. At the same time, is willing to accept help but doesn't necessarily need it.

The Safe Grinder - He doesn't like getting pissed on either. But he has a little more balls than the regular bankroll nit. In response to getting pissed on, he kicks down the ladder and runs away. The poker equivalent would be someone who plays it safe most of the time, moving down when he needs to, but does everything in his power to move up within his "safe" limits. He often uses a safe 30-40 buy-in rule to justify taking shots. At the same time, he is willing to accept help but doesn't necessarily need it.

The Stubborn Grinder - He doesn't mind getting pissed on. He can take it! In fact, he's probably very use to it. In response to the situation, he grabs an umbrella and stays in the same location. The poker equivalent would be someone who refuses to move down in stakes even when they are losing. They just don't lower themselves to "running away" from the problem and face the problem head on. Often times they don’t use any bankroll management at all. At the same time, they accept help from anyone who can give it to them. Most of the time they need a lot of help. But eventually they will learn to deal with the problem from their experience.

The Stubborn Degenerate - He doesn't mind getting pissed on. And from the looks of it, he seems to enjoy it. In response to the situation, he willingly stays in the same spot and continues to get pissed on. The stubborn degenerate always seems to think that if he stays in the same spot long enough that maybe the guy will stop pissing on him. The poker equivalent would be someone who has too big of en ego to ever move down. Nor do they accept help from anyone else. They think they play perfect poker and there is nothing to learn from anyone. When poker starts pissing on the stubborn degenerate, he blames it on variance and hopes that his luck will break even. Sadly he never learns and often goes busto because of it.

The Degenerate Gambler - He likes getting pissed on, and everyone knows this is a fact. In response to the situation, he firmly plants his ass in the same spot and finds enjoyment in getting pissed on. The poker equivalent would be someone who knows they suck, but just plays to have a good time. And a good time they have as they blow through their bankrolls and redeposit several times. They never want to take the time to learn anything from anyone, and therefore they find this habit a repeating cycle.

The Winning Grinder – He doesn’t like getting pissed on. And he has the balls and the smarts to do something about it. In response to the situation, he kicks down the ladder, then gets into a fight with the guy pissing on him. There is no guarantee that he wins the fight, and sometime the guy that was pissing on him kicks the Winning Grinder’s ass and gets back on top of the ladder and continues to piss on him. But one thing is clear: the Winning Grinder does not take shit and does something about it. The poker equivalent would be someone who learns from his experience, and has the balls to do something about it. He uses the 20 buy-in rule, but rarely finds the need to move down since he learns quick and figures out how to beat games. He accepts help from people around him but rarely needs it.

The Big Winner – He doesn’t like getting pissed on. What he does like is pissing on other people. In response to the situation, he climbs up the ladder, pushes down the guy on top of it, and then starts pissing on him. The Big Winner always finds ways to turn problems around and benefit from them. He picks his fights well, and doesn’t get into conflict unless he needs to. The poker equivalent would be your typical SBRugby or GreenPlastic. They are smart about the game, they use safe bankroll management skills, and pick their spots very well. They will run away from a problem if it is profitable for them, they will tackle a problem head on if it seems profitable for them. They see the bigger picture and figure out how to be the biggest winner.

So what type of player are you? And please be as honest as possible.

Poll: What poker personality best fits you in this situation?
(Vote): The Bankroll Nit
(Vote): The Safe Grinder
(Vote): The Stubborn Grinder
(Vote): The Stubborn Degenerate
(Vote): The Degenerate Gambler
(Vote): The Winning Grinder
(Vote): The Big Winner

I am The Bankroll Nit. I'll admit it.

5 votes

Everyone needs to see that you are king of the castle - PoorUser

Last edit: 19/02/2007 16:14

Loco Canada. Feb 19 2007 16:17. Posts 20967

hahaha amazing post.

im the "safe grinder"

fuck I should just sell some of my Pokemon cards, if no one stakes that is what I will have to do - lostaccount

Baalim Mexico. Feb 19 2007 16:38. Posts 34261

winning grinder

Ex-PokerStars Team Pro Online

Floofy Canada. Feb 19 2007 16:44. Posts 8708

WHERES MY TALENTEDTOM PICTURE OF THE DAY

oh and im a stubborn grinder, winning grinders at times

james9994: make note dont play against floofy, ;(

ggplz Sweden. Feb 19 2007 16:56. Posts 16784

where is the fish option

if poker is dangerous to them i would rank sports betting as a Kodiak grizzly bear who smells blood after you just threw a javelin into his cub - RaiNKhAN

BlizzY Slovakia. Feb 19 2007 17:28. Posts 805

stubborn degenerate - that's me

lucifer Sweden. Feb 19 2007 17:43. Posts 5955

poker - winning grinder.

irl - mix safe/winning grinder.

On February 19 2009 22:21 Confedrate wrote: i dont get it

THE RISE Netherlands. Feb 19 2007 17:44. Posts 189

According to this : Big Winner

Rise to the top.

rogier Netherlands. Feb 19 2007 18:32. Posts 1528

wheres the "crushes stakes he plays due to always running good but misses value when reviewing hands" option?

Fayth

Canada. Feb 19 2007 18:49. Posts 10085

i'll go for safe grinder

Im not sure what to do tomorrow when I see her, should I shake her hand?? -Floofy

Karma

Australia. Feb 19 2007 19:21. Posts 3538

Very nice post Cosmo Probably the best blog post I've seen
I'm a safe grinder I guess. When I'm getting pissed on I go away, when I come back later I hope the pissing guy will have left by then