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joker Czech Republic. Feb 03 2009 17:09. Posts 118 | | |
Hi,
I decided to restart my poker career after busting my whole BR. And because I want to take it really seriously I will start my blog here on liquidpoker, hoping it will help me to stay focused and become a part of community :D
Briefly abou my poker life till now - I started playing freerols 2 years ago after watching James Bond : Casino Royale, because I was just fascinated by this game and really wanted to know atl least rules etc. Because I used to play a bit of some other kinds of hazard games (shits like roulette and spins - I really wasnt so clever these days :D, it made me no problem to ship some real money (actually not much, like 20-50 usd per week) to the pokerroom and then absolutely busted it playing NL100 with 1BI etc. Fortunately I really hate when I am loosing in whatever I do, so I started learning some basic strategy stuff and played sngs, tours, cash all together with a bit of succes because I made my BR to 500usd in april 2008. Then I discovered cardrunners and it literally changed my life, because I started watching videos, think more about my game etc. and switched entirely to 6max cash games. I was doing quite good and I moved up from NL25 with 500usd br to NL200 with 8k usd BR in 5 months and was feeling like I just discovered the gold mine :D But then I took a shot at NL400 ...
... and lost close to 5BI on tilt first two sessions and got crazy. I was thinking like this : "OMG WTF I LOST 2k FROM MY 8k BR I HAVE TO CASHOUT SOMETHING TILL I WILL LOST IT ALL" So i did cashout half of my BR with intention to buy some sweet stuff, enjoy the money and work on my game on NL100. It was terrible mistake. I was not able to beat NL100 again. I overestimated my skills everytime I was playing and was sure that I deserve all money on the table, because I AM THE BEST, BIG BALLA WHO PLAYED NL400 AND WILL CRUSH EVERY GAME SOON OF COURSE :D Than every bad beat, unluck, my mistake or just common variance threw me on super tilt, when no matter what stakes I was actually playing I lost 2+ BI every session and was really narky on poker and whole life :D After few weeks of misery, when I tried every anti-tilt and tryingtostayfocused ideas with poor results, I decided to cashout rest of my money to save my nerves and think about something else ...
... but roughly after two months I realized, that I love this game even more than money you can make by playing it (and as student I like the money really much, trust me) and ask my poker playfellow "dratek" ("Drateks" is his nick on lp, he started roughly in the same time as I did - only few months before - and now he is a stable winner at NL200 and taking a shots at NL400, respect to him) to stack me for NL25 and he insta shipped me 700usd for what I want to thank him here. It was on 1st of January when I started playing againg ...
... but nothing changed! I still was a monster tilted monkey and automatically thought that I am the best player on these microstakes tables so they have to give me their money as fast as possible because I want to move up and make some serious cash. Epic fail again - I changed 700 to 300 usd maybe in one week on NL20  ...
... but I dont give up, I will try to fight with it again and now I want to take it really seriously. What definitely change my view on poker, was one answer to "how to stop tilt?" question here on lp. I cant find it again now, but I will reproduce it for you - it was somethink like :
"Everytime when you are sitting on the table and you actually realize that you clearly missplayed some situation, stop your session"
This really hits me hard. I realized that there are nothing like predestined winners. Variance Is bitch and she can slap you in your face very hard and alone make your live living hell when you are running under expectations for 50k hands. There are no predestinated winners also because no-one is clearly better than every single one other player. Your hyper agressive game can be sucesfull agains 99/100 players, but you will not benefit from it in situation when you got tilted agains huge calling station who calls your amazing A high bluff with bottom pair because he thought he has a flush and than you donate him another two BI in monkey iwantmymoneyback tilt, which erase your hard gained winnings from the majority of players. And it is not only about loosing dozens of BI´s in one day. We work really hard to beat others and rake to make something like 5PTBB/100 profit in long term, which is imo very good result everyvhere higher than NL50, but is still only 10 BB per 100 hands! Lets assume that it will take 1 hour to play 100 hands on 6max table, and during this hour you will make two smaller/light-tilted mistakes (call our draw agains odds with no implied odds, run unreal bluff agains calling station in small pot etc.) which each cost us 10BB. These two mistakes can easilly turn our 5PTBB/100 profit from the table to loosing -5PTBB/100. So you should be really concentrated to every decision you make on the table, because it can have a huge impact on your overall winrate. But this may be not end. From my experiece, everytime I made some stupid decision (like calling 8BB to 22BB pot on the river, when I am pretty sure that he has me beat, but given history, actual state of my mind, his nick, weird bet sizing or whatever I finally persuade myself to call, than insta muck my hand and delude myself that he could be bluffing and I had to find out for only 8BB) the next one is coming, will occur really soon but unfortunatelly will cost me much more BB´s. Small mistake will in the end finishes in loosing one or two BI´s. In my opinion this happens because in this point I lost responsibility to my money - I did a clearly bad decision because of that I lost my money, but I say to myself : "Nevermind, it was not too much" and I continue playing ? This is crazy and spewy, because I only allow myself to loose more money with this actual state of mind (and it will happen sooo often). So what I really need to do is start following posted quote. Try to dont tilt and spew ever. Play my best as long as possible and when I saw first indication of tilt/bad play caused by aggro oponent, lucky fish, tideness or whatever just quit the session and come back later with new enthusiasm and clear head. If I will be able to stop my session in the begging of loosing, it will be so easier to come back in 30-60 minutes and play without presure, than lost 4BI´s first session and than try to grind it back whole day no matter what. I will try it ... hope it will work for me :D Secondly I have to stop thinkink about me as skilled player, be humble and hope that the results will come. I am pretty sure that for lot of you this is something you already managed and I say nothing new. Sorry wasting your time then :D
I am quite suprised that you read it all till here :D ... excuse me please for my bad english - this is definitely longest and hardest what I have ever write in english and it took me hour and half of my life so I hope it was readable.
Finally I want to set some of my February goals and overall BR management. Actually dont think it will be interesting for you, but I hope that if I make them public, It will force me to keep them at least a little bit.
I have 1200usd right now so I will start on NL50 and proceed in harmony with this BR management :
NL10 - from 150usd
NL20 - from 400usd - back to NL10 at 300usd
NL50 - from 1000usd - back to NL20 at 850usd
NL100 - from 2300usd - back to NL50 at 2000usd
NL200 - from 5000usd - back to NL100 at 4400usd
Before I start playing NL50 now, I also want to take little "warm-up" ... so I will have to win 3 BI on NL2, NL4, NL10 and NL20 before I actually try NL50. I hope it will be good practise for executing quoted rule and will force me to play solid ABC poker which is crucial on these stakes (I hope I wont stay at NL4 whole month trying to win 12usd).
So actual February goals are :
- win 3x BI on NL2, NL4, NL10, NL20 and be a winner on NL50
- play at least 30k hands
- dont tilt
- finish all of my school stuff
- stop drinking, start grinding :D
If you really read it till here, you deserve this picture. First time we saw it with one my friend we couldnt stop laughting for 15 minutes :D
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Good luck with starting anew
LOL @ pic |
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Chewits United Kingdom. Feb 03 2009 17:30. Posts 2539 | | |
Nice read. Good luck, and always come back and read this when you have a really "bad beat". You have put alot of effort into typing this, so hopefully you can do the same with your Poker.
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| I am a degen. Do not believe in any of my advice. | |
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k2o4 United States. Feb 03 2009 17:52. Posts 4803 | | | |
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EscapingR Netherlands. Feb 03 2009 19:25. Posts 2353 | | |
too much text... im blind |
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Uptown . Feb 04 2009 05:24. Posts 3557 | | |
GL man~ |
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joker Czech Republic. Feb 04 2009 07:17. Posts 118 | | |
Thank you guys ... I actually pass NL2 today by winning 3BI, it was obv soft, but I was suprised to see some 17/16 and 14/13 types of "regs" here on ipoker NL2 :D |
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| | Last edit: 04/02/2009 08:47 |
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