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It's kind of strange to blog about someone else's blog doing parodies about other blogs but eh.. i think this is must read. I took this from Daniel Negreanu's blog. Which you can find here - http://www.fullcontactpoker.com/poker...owfull&id=1253518751&archive=
He's explaining why he likes Phill Helmuth's blog and what he likes about them. He proceeds to write up a standard Phill Helmuth blog.
I'm in a limo with Dom Perrignon and am texting Michael Phelps about hanging out. I'm Phelps' favorite, he loves me more than his medals. In fact, he told me he'd give me one of his medals if I'd sleep with him, but Phelps is not my type, although a sex tape would probably make me more famous....hmmm? No, wait a minute, I get the ladies baby, they are all over me when I go out. I've been working out and I'm pretty buff so I can see why they just pass out when I walk in a room in my Caesar costume showing off my tiny nipples.
I just landed in LA to do a show and then go to a "VIP" night spot for celebrities and important people, it's not for just regular people. You have to be really, really, cool to get in. I hear Ivey tried to get in, but couldn't. That's probably because I have 11 bracelets and he doesn't. I'm by FAR the best NLH tournament player in the world and it's not even close. Most celebrities and important people know that, I think, and that's why they all want me to hang out with them and give speeches about how amazing I am and stuff. I mean, I have to give the people what they want right?
In fact, I ran into Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at the airport and they must have been in awe of me. They walked right by me and didn't say hi or anything. I'm sure they were just trying to respect my privacy, because I get mobbed everywhere I go. They understand what it's like for people like us. You can't have a normal life with paparazzi always hounding you. It's the price you pay I guess...
After the club I'm going to stay at the very best hotel in LA. It's where all the top stars stay so I figured I should also stay there since I'm the greatest poker player in the world.
Oh, and I can't forget to mention every single celebrity I know. I kno how much you guys like hearing me drop some names so I won't disappoint!
People that hung out with me this month:
Shaquille O'Neal, McCauley Caulkin, the guy from that Dove commercial that laughs at the end, Gary Coleman, the back up guitarist for the Beatles, Vanilla Ice, New York (from I Love New York), Scott Baio, Tonya (from the Real World), and oh! almost forgot, Tonya Harding and I are doing an event where we teach kids about sports ettiquette and fair play! I am a great guy and like to "give back" to the people less important than me.
Phil Hellmuth...out.
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4TM United States. Sep 21 2009 06:49. Posts 712 | | | |
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EscapingR Netherlands. Sep 21 2009 07:43. Posts 2353 | | |
lol this shit is good
Patrik Antonius:[ It's so sick, like, last week I bought moisturizer to make sure my skin stays silky smooth and, like, they discontinue my brand. Now I have to fly back to Finland to see my doctor to make sure I don't put any bad kind of cream on my face because you can't trust, like, any brand.
I won, like, 5 million last month and broke my mouse because I was so pissed off about running so bad. It's sick. Like, if the cards ever break even I'm going to win so much money. I could have won like $10 million, so sick, I'm just frustrated.
You just don't understand how tough it can be to deal with. $5 million is not bad for some people, but my face cream is really expensive and I also pay my hairdresser a lo,t because I don't trust too many people with my hair. It's not easy to cut perfectly and I won't go outside unless I look like perfect. So I'm basically screwed right now, a little bit depressed, but whatever, it could be worse... I guess :-(
I'm going to go to the gym now for another 15 hour workout then eat some grilled chicken and a protein shake. I only worked out, like, 6 hours yesterday and I can already feel like I'm getting fat. |
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Achoo Canada. Sep 21 2009 07:53. Posts 1454 | | |
lmao DN has some sense of humor ... that was pretty good |
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Fraser Canada. Sep 21 2009 12:34. Posts 4605 | | | |
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