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On July 20 2012 04:49 longple wrote: just dont whine about anything, be more positive in life even with the small things, dont be a hater dont be a whiner and dont be needy, it jsut creates more negativety in the end thats me atleast in my worse of days, anxiety - whine (even if its just whining to myself) - disgust - more anxiety - more whine = not profit

in biloxi, mississippi some guy just flatted me on the river deep in the tournament with the nuts on the river (flush) and when the hand was over i threw my ante chip at him

On July 20 2012 04:49 longple wrote: i feel shit when winning at times to, just like this scenario, its standard and then we feel disgusted with ourselfs because we anret happy when we should be or w/e, that we dont appricieate stuff enough and such. it happends to all of us, but why take it a step further and go cry to people about it or go out being arrogant about it, start wars and shit, its really no use. thats when the real anxiety of disgust hits me atleast, when i whine about something to people that really arent a big deal compared to real stuff just dont whine about anything, be more positive in life even with the small things, dont be a hater dont be a whiner and dont be needy, it jsut creates more negativety in the end thats me atleast in my worse of days, anxiety - whine (even if its just whining to myself) - disgust - more anxiety - more whine = not profit

ok thanks for the advice. ill try to take it into consideration in the future. like i said tho, im just very compulsive, so sometimes it happens and theres nothing i can do about it afterward.

On July 20 2012 06:31 RaiNKhAN wrote: Show nested quote + On July 20 2012 04:49 longple wrote: just dont whine about anything, be more positive in life even with the small things, dont be a hater dont be a whiner and dont be needy, it jsut creates more negativety in the end thats me atleast in my worse of days, anxiety - whine (even if its just whining to myself) - disgust - more anxiety - more whine = not profit in biloxi, mississippi some guy just flatted me on the river deep in the tournament with the nuts on the river (flush) and when the hand was over i threw my ante chip at him

u shoulda thanked him.

the past couple years ive basically been a grinder. i play much smaller than my bankroll allows and never have big swings but unless i bink a tourney i rarely have a huge month. i mostly play 1/2 with some 2/4 mixed in and on average make around 4-5k a week when i grind on stars. due to splitting time between cali and out of the country i probably play about 2 weeks out of every 6 so its not like im averaging huge money per year doing this but its still a decent backbone to have included with all my other income (cardrunners videos, tourney wins, backing, etc). its good solid money and very consistent but i dont often have big months.

in june i went on a tourney heater. i won 6k in 2 weeks playing cash but made over 50k in tourneys in that stretch. after the last one i got a little depressed because i was like "now what?". i was so used to setting a pace for myself, trying to meet a goal and making sure i put in enough hands to make my 5k a week and now that i had made more than that quota for a long time i didnt know what to do with myself and i got that feeling you get when youre coming down off of molly pills. everything felt kinda hopeless and empty and that there was no point in doing what i was doing.

i do understand getting down or upset at weird times. booking a huge winner than losing a big pot that doesnt affect the overall session much but still affects you negatively happens. people arent robots and things get to all of us that shouldnt. id be lying if i said something like this never happened to me. usually its in the form of i win 10X in a certain game then lose X in a much smaller game and am frustrated for losing in this game and feel like i got lucky to be on the plus side of variance at a bigger stake for the 10X win, but yours can happen too. i would be more angry if i made a bad play at the end of a session to lose a 9k pot and ended up 20k rather than being bad beat for a 9k pot because thats just bad luck. but i get it

5k / week at 1/2? ur raping pretty hard