1
 |
RiKD  United States. Apr 05 2023 01:13. Posts 8992 | | |
REFUGE IN PAINTING WITH REAL PAINT BRUSHES ON REAL CANVAS!!!!! AARAARARRHHGHHGHGHHHHH!!!!! |
|
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 03:11. Posts 8992 | | |
But, I have no easel and I am literally on my knees painting. On my knees for It.
Refuge in philosophy.
But, philosophy is wordy. Maybe too wordy at times.
Help, I am alive and I want.
Revert to the laws of nature. Bread and water. Oh, I wish.
Vivid dreams. I am free at last. I am free at last. |
|
|
1
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 03:14. Posts 8992 | | |
awake, for better or for worse |
|
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 03:21. Posts 8992 | | |
I am human. Simply human. I have saliva, sweat, semen, blood, shit, piss. Hey Pig, take me in your mouth today. How depraved of me?
Human. Human. Human. Human. |
|
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 03:25. Posts 8992 | | |
I shouldn't be so bummed that I am Alive but man, I really got to find better stuff to do with my precious time that is withering away as I type. |
|
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 03:53. Posts 8992 | | |
Withering away as I type. My life withering away by the day. I try to learn how to die but that is tough to do.
I shouldn't really be depressed. I am lifting weights and taking creatine. That is a real depression killer. I go to a job that can be repetitive and dull. My therapist says that I am very intelligent and that I probably need some "mind candy" on a daily basis. It also would be nice to have friends. blah blah blah.
Maybe I'll learn how to code for the 5th time. Although, I already know how to code with my good buddy Chat GPT.
I get through the day just to get through the day. That equates to some sort of soft misery.
It really does boil down to help, I'm alive and I want. It's like not even Seneca can help me. I'm in trouble. |
|
|
1
|
1
|
1
|
1
|
1
|
1
|
1
|
RiKD United States. Apr 05 2023 04:39. Posts 8992 | | |
Make sure to take my meds and read Seneca before sleep. I'm in the range of reasonable sleep. I seem to just end up listening to music and creating collaborative ai digital art. It's just what is dragging my attention right now. I would paint more but it kind of ruins the vibe to keep everything contained so no drop touches anything but the canvas. That's a lot of pressure when I'm trying to have fun and be free. I really should look into getting a studio here in town. That would make me infinitely happy or at least I think it would for a period of time. There really are very few guarantees in life. I might do 1, 2, 3, 4 paintings and be in paradise before the spirit leaves me poof. I may die tomorrow. So, enjoy the present. |
|
|
|
Contact Users: 559 Active, 0 Logged in - Time: 15:07
