WOW

What are you going back to school for?

Yeah, employment sucks but unemployment can suck more under a certain burnrate. I get by somehow but I am going to run out of money at some point. Searching for jobs is soul crushing for sure. It's like binking an MTT to find a job. Not even a good one.

going to be a peer support worker, help the people in need.

it pays like 28-30$ an hour which is not bad

Nice.

Something WOW in my life is I am waiting for a recently translated from German book by Helmuth Plessner!

That's #1 probably. I received "Introduction to Systems Theory" by Niklas Luhmann and read the introduction and the preface and I wasn't ecstatic but I was pleased. It's not like I can spend my entire day reading these books and be happy though. That's an unrealistic expectation.

"The safest way of not being very miserable is not to expect to be very happy."- Arthur Schopenhauer

There is not a whole lot of brightness in my life at the moment which you probably can understand but should I expect brightness?

I enjoy not waking up to an alarm, bagels, coffee, jazz music, reading, writing, taking my dog for a walk. How many times can I take my dog for a walk?! It is all fragile. I wouldn't want to be locked in my room doing any one of these things all day. I started doing Duolingo. Many times the guitar feels like a chore. How do I get the magic back?

I am reading dissertations. I am reading The Brother's Karamozov. I am reading Luhmann. These are all great ways to spend time but any one of them could become rusty nails and I can't control that. Just do something else, Just do something else. Well, that's why I'm writing this post in here. I need human connection. I need to meditate. I need to exercise. I need gratitude.

I am grateful for:

- Music
- German thought
- Not waking up to an alarm
- Bagels
- Coffee

I've been playing so much this week I am tired, I aint even winning. turn 20$ into 250$ then busto it trying to win 3k in a day.aggressuve shot taking lol oh well

rikd meetups there isn't any in ur city or something? so many new people here in Vancouver I can meet up with every day. I am rarely bored but I do get bored once in awhile cuz I only sleep 5 hours a day on average so I have so much time to do things and can't find 19 hours of activities to do sometimes. poker took so much of my time last week but I had so much fun losing 20$ hahaha but it was tilting losing all that 250$ back playing some 50$ spins and other degenerate things haha. if I stick to plo cash game I will win. im a winner up to nl50 maybe win even at nl200 but I just don't have the bankroll to play nl200 but I don't mind taking 5BI n playing 2 tables of nl50 haha cause even if I lose I don't sweat it. im trying to Neilly it turn 100$ into 5k then play nl1k or higher haha. but I love u Neilly u r crushing now for that I am happy for u

1st baby in 10$ tournament for 2k

only reason why I stop poker was cause of health n girls but now health is good n taking half a break from girls