you should try to get some help and put effort to improve your perception and outlook in life, instead of putting forth effort to destroy it.
i know everyone has a different situation and set of life circumstances... i will just share that i was once suicidal and have tried, and had (have) some friends who were in similar mindsets. it was tough to find happiness or pleasure and life seemed like a waste of time and effort and resources and everything was this malaise and grey.
it does not have to be this way. i tried medications, as did my friends, and some helped and others did not. some of my friends are still in dark places. i just want to encourage you to try because there are people who care about you, even if you feel you are without value. you do have a place and an opportunity to receive some enjoyment out of your time here. we will all die, unless science does reach some miracle type of breakthrough in that field. however, since that hasnt come and we are going to die, why not use your time to try to find things you could enjoy, no matter how small? and if you feel no joy, maybe use your time and effort to help others in need. that would be a productive and healthy way to live, instead of wasting a gift you were lucky enough to receive, even if you did not want it.
if you want to talk you are welcome to PM me. there are resources available and counselors to talk to. i hate to see that anyone is stuck in a dark corner of the mind and feel so down the only remedy is death. it took me a lot of hard work, therapy, and support to get where i am. dont give up. |