So I came home for the weekend cause I wanted to take care of some poker business stuff -- meeting with a lawyer to get some contracts written for my live backing deals.
Anyway, so im sitting at the kitchen table and my mom starts shaking her head at me and goes "such a waste...its so disappointing that youre not going to school anymore, such a waste of math talent"
So i look at my mom and go "If i had a 15 inch penis would it be a waste of talent if I wasnt a pornstar?"
To my surprise Kathy actually laughed. And then she looked at me and said "Yes, i guess it would be a waste"
This semester I'm "taking" 3 classes. Abstract Algebra 2, Complex/Functional Analysis and Advanced Mathematical Logic 2. I have taking in quotations because I haven't exactly been the model student for attendance.
So I didnt go to abstract algebra for a little while. On the friday after spring break, I decided to make an appearance only to find out that there was a midterm coming up on the following monday. This posed a major problem. Basically, even if I wanted to buckle down and study for it, i had no idea what was even on the test because it had been so long since I had went to class. I figured id just show up to the test and as the title says, empty the clip and let the looooord decide.
I asked the good people in the BBV forum at twoplustwo what I should do, and their response was invariably "DROP OUT!"
Then my buddy Jonny Cosmo drew this graph to describe my situation:
I knew what I had to do. I just didnt go to the test. That's what real poker players do, they fold the hand when they know theyre beat.
So I talked things over with my parents and told them I dont really think grad school is for me. If i'm not motivated enough to go to class and dont want to learn this stuff then I really shouldnt be here. So I'm going to hang out for the rest of the semester and withdraw from my classes.
Ok, so anyway, on to the point of this post. Since then I havent been going to class, i've just been playing poker, working out, watching movies, etc. So I've basically been going down imdb's top 250 list and checking out the movies ive always wanted to but never did, and pretty much have been watching one a day. In the past week I've seen apocalypse now, reservoir dogs, kill bill 1 and 2, and raging bull for the first time ever. but I cant seem to find the one movie i really want to see...
For the past 2 weeks ive been trying to find the seven samurai. Not in best buy, not in circuit city, not in blockbuster, not in the little movie racks at walmart or target. Nowhere. I was beginning to believe this movie didnt really exist. And then I remembered a little movie place down the street called mike's movies. I was sure this dude would have it, i mean he specializes in movies, hes got to.
As I pulled up and saw the front of the store I became really skeptical. I mean on the front window the only movie poster he had was Charlotte's Web.
Imagine walking up to the window of a promising movie store and seeing a 24 x 32 in. shot of that fat little blob's mug. I totally lost faith. i decided to enter anyway.
First I hit up the classics section. No seven samurai.
then I went to the drama section. No seven samurai.
Next I hit up adventure. No seven samurai.
With a disgusted scowl on my face I started to walk out when I just saw it sitting there in the middle of this unnamed rack. WOOHOOO.
It was pretty damn expensive, the movie cost over 40 fucking dollars, but that ain't nothin to a boss.
When I first saw this hand I immediately thought it was the worst call I had ever seen. However, the more I think about it the more interesting the hand gets. For those of you who havent seen or heard about this hand, it came up in the monte carlo tournament a few days ago. Here was the spot:
Patrick Antonius makes it 1k from the cutoff. Adam makes it 3.2k from the button and Antonius makes it 9k. Adam calls.
Flop:
Qc 2s 4c
Patrick moves in for 34.5k. The break has just happened, but a crowd is developing around the table as only the two players remain seated. Adam keeps staring intently at Patrick, checking his chips, it'll cost most of his stack to call. Patrick sits impassively. Finally, eyes still focused on Patrick, Adam pushes the 34.5k into the pot, and Patrick visibly loses the colour out of his face as he flips over 3c 5s . Adam turns over first the Ac, then....the Jd ! Everyone including Patrick manages a double take. I hear people shocked, yet still somehow impressed at the call.
Turn:
8s
River:
As
Patrik raked a ~90k pot with a straight.
So as I said it came off as a bad call at first. I did a quick analysis on how adam does against a sample hand range of patrik's.
We are getting roughly 1.5:1 odds but a little bit better, so lets say we need 39% equity.
If we assume that patrik has air here 20%, a draw (clubs, gutshot, oesd etc) 30% and a monster (set/AA/KK) 50% then we get the following.
Suppose against air that Junglen has on average 75% equity. This fair because if patrik has 2 live cards hes about 25% and sometimes he has adam dominated (AK), sometimes adam has patrik dominated. but I have trouble beliving that patrik will often just shove hands like 68o where he missed completely, so i think 20% of the time is a generous estimate here.
Now, against a draw, lets say that adam has 50% equity on average. This is also fair because some big draws are more than 50% vs adam(like 56cc) and some gutshots are a bit under.
And against a monster, lets say adam has on average 8% equity. sometimes he will have a little more if patrik has KK, sometimes he will be murdered against a set, sometimes patrik will have AQ, whatever, 7% is fairly accurate.
ok, now his ev given these assumptions is .2*.75+.3*.5+.5*.08=.15+.15+.04=.34
34% equity. This is not good, in fact its quite -EV. If we adjust the hand range a bit to include more air and less monsters perhaps we can convince ourselves that adam has CLOSE to enough quity against patrik's range. (this would require a very very very good read because adam is getting very bad odds and patrik will often show a good hand here)
Now, let's backstep a bit before i continue.
I think the call preflop is terrible. Here is adam's quote on the situation, right after it happened:
His range for 3-betting preflop is so wide...When I called the 6k extra I was trapping. I don't care, I've played 10k comps before, his move in was a scared bet, I'd have probably called with King high.
how exactly do you trap with AJo? you dont hit flops often enough and when you dont you arent even certain of where you stand. It's a total reverse implied odds situation. I think that the call preflop is atrocious, and if he really thought his range was that wide, he should shove. he would be risking roughly 41k to win 14k, and he gets folds more than enough to make this a very good play (much much much more EV than calling here even though he has position). I wont bother running the EV calculations but I assure you this is very +EV if patrik is calling with say AA KK QQ JJ AK and is putting in a 3rd raise about 10% of the time (which would mean he is calling 1/3 the time and folding 2/3 the time). Ok, just for you guys ill run the damn EV calculation
Let's say that patrik calls the all in 33% and folds 67%. when he calls, AJo has 25% equity against that range.
.67*14=9.38 (when he folds we win 14k)
.33*(.75*-41+.25*48)=.33*(-30.75+12)=.33*-18.75=-6.25
so our EV of shoving here is over 3k. very very good.
I'll also add in that folding to this 4bet is just fine as well. Nothing wrong with it, havent risked a lot, AJo isnt all that strong. And it's also ok toflat cal with AJo in position here.
ok, back to where i was. now, suppose that we can convince ourselves that Adam almost has enough equity against patrik's range but it is still -EV to call. I think if we have a good enough read to convince ourselves of this it becomes a call postflop for the following 3 reasons.
1. we have a chance to knockout the best player in the world
2. we will have a big chip stack which we will be able to take advantage of because....
3. Everyone at the table will utterly fear us.
Imagine how scared the average poker player would be of a guy who just bitched the best player in the world and now has a stack. If he could have a 100k stack after this move, its at a point in the tournament where nobody will fuck with him and he can just run everyone over and build a monster stack in the next few hours. It would have such profitable aftereffects that I think having a slight -EV situation is overcome with ease.
The question becomes how -EV are we willing to go in order to still take this gamble? Unfortunately that isnt quantifiable, but I would guess that its around 35% equity, a little bit higher than I came up with in my EV calculation.
Now, note that I said i was giving patrik a generous range, and I still think that. I just dont see how we can assume he has air or a draw here much more than that, I would usually assume much less, but for the sake of argument i gave adam the benefit of the doubt in his read. perhaps adam was a little more sure of this and could push it into the 35%+ range. Then although it's still a -EV call, i say great move.
Kid's sure got balls to pull something like this. I still think the preflop call is atrocious, but after a lot of thought I have come to appreciate this postflop call. he gets my gold star award for the week, mainly because its the manliest call of all time, he obviously has some Bryan Van Dautsend blood in him to make patrik say matte.
So my wrist has been killing me lately. It's mainly from the desk I have at school where I play poker, my wrist is always placed in an awkward position when im using the mouse.
I went to circuit city to get something to make it more comfortable to play poker. I found this soft little bag that I put behind my mouse that i rest my hand on, pretty much perfect.
So i'm walking to check out when I see the movie section. I decide to walk through and see if there's anything I want.
I hit the jackpot. I only find the most inspirational movie of my childhood........BLOODSPORT.
I've watched it 2 times since buying it already. Only a real man can make a bad mother fucker like chong li say matte.
Between this and aba's blog post about how hes going to play less tables, review hands after each session, stop browsing the internet and such have really inspired me.
Forget Patrik Dautonius. He's a mere mortal. Meet Bryan Van Dautsend.
Part Aba. part Van Damme. Part me. Combining the best of all 3 to create the ultimate male. GG World.
Proving i have the mental maturity of a 6 year old
Daut, Mar 28 2007
So I got a chat warning from FTP.
A few nights ago, I was railing aba vs durrrr hu, and I saw someone in the chat type I JUST FARTED BLOOD
I thought this was hysterical, so me and a few friends just started going crazy in the chatroom. The next day a chat warning from FTP shows up in my mailbox.
Hello Ryan,
It has come to our attention that you have been abusing your chat
privileges at the tables. We value all players and wish to cultivate an
environment in which they can play without being harassed or called
names at the tables. A copy of the offending chat is shown below:
2007-03-26:
WOMEN AT THE POKER TABLE MAKE ME FART
HAS ANYONE SEEN THE SPATULA? IM ABOUT TO POOP A CHICKEN CASSEROLE
I LOST SOMETHING IN MY ANUS
I THINK MY BUTT ATE MY FLASH LIGHT
Please be advised that future infractions of this nature may cause your
chat privileges to be revoked for an extended period; repeated
infractions may result in the permanent suspension of your chat
privileges.
We thank you for your cooperation in this matter, and wish you best of
luck at the tables.
Regards,
Carolina
Full Tilt Poker Support
What am i 5 years old? I was a little shocked that I got a chat warning for saying words like poop butt and fart. I assumed those were ok since thats basically the entire vocabulary of a 4 year old and you can say them on cable TV without consequence. I sent an email back saying "admit it, you laughed" and didnt get a response. I guess this is no laughing matter.
So I had a bit of a bad run the past few weeks. Still up around 105k from 25/50 this year, but been doing bad in PLO, and down about 65k from my peak at 25/50. I wasnt running so well and didnt feel like I was playing my best at all. So I decided to play lower stakes for a bit. I've been playing mainly 3/6 6max on stars, and i love it. the players are just awful and I am doing very well there the past 2 weeks (up about 10k ish in 12k ish hands, pretty sad that I was down 5k there to begin with)
And wtf is wrong with me at 10/20 6max. Everytime I play there i just get demolished. The first thing im going to do is get the 5/10 full ring into the green, then im going to start working on that 10/20 6max and figure out what the hell im doing wrong there, cause thats just pathetic.
So last night a bunch of my friends were getting deep in the stars 320, so I took some time to rail the donkament. My buddy mike martin, martine23, actually ended up taking it down for 44k. Pretty sicko score, but thats secondary to what took place.
When the money bubble hit, i was railing apestyles, but noticed that randallin was still alive. So i double click his name and get to his table. Now I havent railed randal in a while in a tournament, so I didnt know that he changed his avatar. It used to be a picture of ActionJeff drunk, it was pretty funny. Now its just a logo for the red hot chili peppers. So I make a comment in the chat that I miss his old avatar. I didnt notice that Vanessa Rousso was also on the table. Ok, lets backtrack a tad.
Some of you might not have seen my cardplayer interview before the PCA final table, but in it I ramble on for a few minutes about farting and vanessa. She was on my table day 1 at pca and i accidentally limped under the gun because I was checking her out and thought I was the big blind. Here is a link to the interview for those that havent seen it, its the second one, titled "Ryan Daut Before The Final Table":
Daut44 [observer]: i miss your old avatar
LadyMaverick: awww sorry daut
LadyMaverick: k ill chng it bak just for u
LadyMaverick: :-)
LadyMaverick: next time ur on chek it out
Kcannon [observer]: How come daut gets special privlades
Kcannon [observer]: privlages
LadyMaverick: hes a sweety
Vanessa also changed her avatar, but I didnt even notice, i was talking to randallin, but she thought I was talking to her. Good thing she did. I guess she saw the interview I made. Nothing says I love you more than talking about someone in an interview on cardplayer.
Too bad chad brown already has his foot in the door. Not that 6'3 225 pound jacked good looking hollywood actors have anything on me. I mean after all I am patrik antonius junior.
I give it a couple weeks before she sees the light.
So after I busto'ed out of the shooting star, im walking to the front of the casino when i bump into patrik antonius. He's standing there, dressed in a nice button up shirt with his muscles bulging out of it and looking how pretty much every guy poker player wants to look.
I stood there a few seconds scowling at him in jealousy. I then decided that I'm going to become patrick antonius junior.
I am going to start working out every day, eating healthier, dressing nicer, and playing my best at all times. Oh yeah, and ill probably shave my head.
By the time of the WPT championship next month, you wont be able to tell us apart. Not that you can now.
So last weekend I went to the celebrity invitational. It was a lot of fun, i got to meet/play with a bunch of celebs. Tourney was shitty structure, really fast, started with 50bb, blinds went up every 30 minutes and i just lost every all in i had. oh well, who cares, i got to play with mekhi phifer, timothy busfield and the creator of the simpsons, and got to talk to a bunch of other people.
cash games went shitty, 3rd hand at the table took a 12k 4 outer on the turn at 20/40, didnt bring enough money to play 20/40 after that so i had to grind the terrible weak tight 10/20 games and made a little more than half of it back.
Anyway, CA was fun, got to hang out with lyric, mango, and jonny cosmo, and met some other cool people out there. ok, the rest of the trip is meaningless besides the plane ride back.
So, I get on the plane on monday morning to fly home. Im really exhausted cause I've been up for like 25 hours at this point (didnt go to bed that night). As I'm walking to my seat I see that I'm the luckiest man alive and have the hottest girl on the plane next to me. Man do I run good sometimes.
so i sit down, say hi and dont really say much more to start. She looks really familiar to me, but I just cant place who it is. A couple minutes later she asks if I could get out so she could go to the bathroom. so I move out of the way and she stands up and i see that shes 6'1. then all of a sudden it dawned on me, HOLY SHIT ITS JENNIE FINCH.
for those of you that dont follow sports, jennie finch is like this phenom softball player who was voted the hottest female athlete a few years running back in like 2003 and 2004.
in this poll she demolished anna kournikova as the hottest female athlete.
her softball achievments (what a sicko):
Led Arizona to 2001 NCAA softball championship with 32-0 record as a pitcher, two-time national player of the year, three-time All-American. Finished career with a record of 199-16 and also hit 50 home runs.
Anyway I havent heard anything about her in the last couple of years. It turns out shes married and has a kid, which really shocked me, shes only 26. The kid is 9 months old and his name is Ace. Hes going to be pretty much the best pitcher ever, seeing as how both parents are awesome pitchers (dad is on the diamondbacks).
So we got to talking. Shes going to be on a fantasy baseball show coming up in the next few months. Fantasy baseball was like my life for 8 years so i told her everything i knew about it. Then we started talking about what i did and poker came up.
pretty sad. i thought i was in but i blew it.
oh yeah, awesome news. so im getting into backing some really good mtt players in live tournaments with my friend victor (nazgul18 on stars, owns liquidpoker), and last night my boy bodogari won the 300 in AC for 63k weeeee. Ari is the man, hes already cashed in 3 events, only played in 8 for me, hes so sick. We're also going to be backing mig.com and hopefully a few others that im not sure about yet.
ill be at bay 101 in san jose playing in the 2k and 10k events out there next week. hopefully i book another big win.
one last little note. taylor showed me this link about the PPA. check out the video on pocketfives.
So I just remembered a funny poker story I read. A few years back when a bunch of us were making little poker threads on a starcraft forum, this one guy came in acting like he owned the place and making all these ridiculous posts about hands he supposedly played in a casino. They were always totally outrageous and had weird nicknames for everyone in the hand.
Here is an example of one (it's pretty long but definitely worth reading):
Hello everyone, i have been visiting these forums for about 3 years, just never had the urge to post anything until recently when all the poker disccusion has come about. My name is Alex the Greek, or thats what everyone calls me at the hardrock casino and the dogtrack. I have never played a hand of online poker, yet ive been playing living live action for around 2 and a half years.
The highest ring game limits aloud in florida to people under 21 is 2-4 fixed, which doesnt give your bankroll much room for improvement unless you hit a fantastic rush. The average night of a session of about 5 hours i cash for around a 100-200, yet i know the softer games and i steer clear of the tables that are screwed down. Anyway i have noticed a couple high caliber players here, and when i mean a few i mean a few. anyway i will start posting the some hands here and would like feedback from anyone. I am always trying to seal my leaks. ok heres the latest hand i played in a 180 person 500$+50 buy in NL(only way i can play NL without going out to the boats and im not 21 for a year) Plus NL is by Far my most solid game. Ok here is the Hand
Blinds 10,000/20,000 ante of 2000 FinalTable
Jon Baacks: UTG raises 60,000 to go <---big stack at the table 580K
Tony Terror Tremis: folds
Jared Piazza: folds
Tiny tom:folds
unknown fish: calls (with hands shakin)
AlexTheGreek: KhJh I call i have 427k
rest fold to the button
Sticky Sam: sits for a while actin incredbly strong and moves his shortstack all-in for 150,000
(this guy just took a huge beat to jonny straight to the boat, so i knew he was either stealin and movin in with a desperation hand)
Jon:Re raises Sticks big bet to obvisously push me out of the pot. His raise was 250,000.
Unknown Fish folds slopily
Now let me give you some info on how jon plays. Ive played him heads up in about 35 tournaments and our paths have crossed many a time, hes loose and will bet suited connectors just like aces. So i put him on the holdings inbetween 9-Js, 10-Js, 7-8s, 9-Qs and maybe , i mean maybe AKs or wired 9's and below. BUT VERY unlikly for he wouldve moved in on me there.
AlexTheGreek: I start shuffling my chips and smiling. I ask, "thats not ganna be enough to get me outta this one jon boy," I proclaimed. "In fact jonny your destined to go broke on this hand" once again taunting trying to trying to pull him into conversation. "Your really re raising that much with just 4's" He proceeds to tell me hes got a made hand. I take a WHILE TO Call this, im almost positive my reads right and hes really weak. Then all of a sudden he asks for the fuckin clock to be brought out, now i know.
"RAISE" I EXCLAIM. Make it 300k to go jon boy, while i slide in almost 3/4ths of my stack
"Thats enough to keep you in right jon? in a cocky arrogant voice."
Jon looks disgusted: after nearly mucking his hand he reluctanly calls. usually i would take this as he has a monster, and my read was way off, but like i said i know this guy well enough to put him on a hand and decide a betting pattern suited for that particular situation.
The Flop
10d 8s 3d
Jon still looks steaming at this point. this is were i know i can win this hand with anything, i am going to use the edge of him being off his game for some reason or another, or maybe its because i have straight up outplayed this guy on many occasions. and the best thing about it is i have confidence oozing out of me.
Jon checks - Now this is not good.why not put me all in here??? i was almost sure hed do it and id call him instantly with K High, but now im wondering how far behind i am i in this hand
AlexTheGreek - this is not time for a bet at all, im 99% sure hell go all in and im beat.
Check!!!!
The Turn
4h
Jon: again he checks, now im baffled, because if he had a straight draw he woulda bet it at the less expensive street or check raised, therefore almost certainly getting a free card. Is this fucker slow playin a set of 8's even on a straight draw and flush draw board?? now this is a possibilty. Ok its time to stop bullshiting and find out where im at
Alex the Greek: 27k leaving me a hundred Thousand left. The thing i love about these bets in no limit they are sooo hard to see through and if he comes over the top i can easily lay this down and still have plenty of chips to work with since most of the table is tight and ive been pushing them around with ease.
Now this is were he went wrong. Its funny how even good players like him who cash almost every tournament in Tampa can make such dumb mistakes
Jonny BOY: gives me the weirdest look, puts his hands over all his chips and to my dismay he gives me the question ive heard fuckin a billion times, how much you got left over there Greek. this is a question that i dont feel obligated to answer, so i take my hands out of the way and the dealer counts em down. I give a smirk cause i cant believe how many tells ive gotten on him these past few minutes!and i also realize something else, how weak his STRAIGHT DRAW IS LOOKIN! ive finally narrowed it down to J-9cd Not spades or he wouldve been firing. My first analysis of startin hands was pretty on point.
Jonny Boy: Smooth calls.
Now at this point i cant believe it, but i know im ahead with just a K High, insane. and here comes the river down and dirty.
River
The Ace of Spades
Also known as Calamity Jane by all card room rounders
and boy oh boy did she live up to her name.
Jon boy:Without a thought of hesitation he moves all-in
by this time about 300+ railbirds are screaming people are goin wild, because this is by far the biggest pot played in the tourny and the 2 big stacks fire at eachother.(i was told this by my boy jared who folded pre flop, because all i saw and heard was jon and the chips getting splashed around the pot. NOW THIS IS A HUGE DECESION for all my money. of course im getting at least 8-1 8.5-1 on the pot. thats great odds but the payout for 10th is 1,500, but the money doesnt really matter. to me if it isnt 1st then its as good as finishing 180th. This is what i was debating, did he have the case ace? it took me only a few moments to rule it out after going through the hand twice. so this is what i said.
alex the greek: "Jonny boy, this might be the sickest read ever or you played this hand fuckin brilliant(i was warned for profanity AGAIN!) Jon, i got you sittin on J-9 trying to steal this pot with a busted draw. I dont have much of a hand AT all. in NL my ability to read people and put myself in their shoes is my god given gift. i made sure not to second guess my instincts and got all my money in there.
SHOWDOWN FOR SIDE POT 854k
Alex the Greek: Shows K high J kicker
Jon Boy: Shows J high 9 kicker
SHOW DOWN MAIN POT 450K
Alex the Greek: Shows K high J kicker
Sticky Sam: Shows Kc 9h
the crowd is awstruct or so i was told no body could stop talkin about how either i had a fuckin killer read on my opponent or im just a calling station who will cold call with K high, and the funniest thing was the biggest pot in the hole tournament won with a K high.
any constructive criticism is fine, im always looking for ways to improve my hand. i will be posting alot more. and yes i did go on to win the 22k 1st place prize as short handed and 10-1 chip ration was a walk in the park against everyone expect my boy jared. AND WHO KNOWS I MIGHT GIVE THIS ONLINE THING A CHANCE feel free to PM anytime or IM me
One of the guys on the forum, (i think his stars name is kimjongillin) decided to counter it with the following post:
Will somebody please read this hand history and tell me how I could have played it better? I'm always looking to improve on my hands.
It was a hot and dry day in El Paso when I played that hand in 1849. I'm not sure why I decided to return to the saloon, and once more risk losing it all; maybe it was boredom, days on end of seeing nothing from my porch besides hot, dry sand and desert lizards reflected in the rising steam. God knows where that steam came from. There wasn't water for miles.
I burst through the doors of The Broken Spoke holding all that i had earned from my 3 long months working on the ranch of Dallas Bill, one hundred and two dollars. I looked down back to my usual table: the usual suspects were at it again: Switchblade Joe, Tumbleweed Tim, Vegas Black, and Double Dee. Me? They call me Six-Shooter Sam.
I took my seat. The name of the game was $100 NL, the highest stakes in town. I shouted at the bartender. "Hey Lady, bring me some goddamn whiskey." Luckily, she had it. I would have taken horse piss. Anything to rid myself of the grit on the back of my throat.
First hand I'm on the big blind, and I look down to find the king of hearts and the ten of spades. Folds all around to me, except for Vegas Black who makes it three to go. I eyed him over carefully. He was a smooth one, that Vegas Black; unpredictable, like a cross-breed between a rattlesnake and a scorpion: you never quite could tell which way he was slithering, but one sting from him and men were pushing up daisies. Vegas Black was known in Texas to raise pots with any old hand, he could be sitting on anything from 2 7 offsuit to a pair of bullets. I saw a drop of sweat roll down my forehead and hit the felt. Vegas gave me a sinister grin. "Call." He urged. "I dare ya."
I called his raise. The flop comes 10 clubs, 7 clubs, A spades. Vegas bets out strong, $6, clearly trying to bluff me out.
"It'll take a lot more than that to get me out of this pot, partner," I said to Vegas in a raspy voice, my throat raw from the sand and the whiskey. "$20 to go."
Vegas lit a cigarette and sucked the smoke through the gap where his left front tooth used to be before he lost it taming Memphis, the wild black stallion that townsfolk rumored Vegas found at the gates of hell after getting shot by Kentucky Jack on the longest day December. "$50."
"I call."
The turn comes up, the Ace of diamonds. Vegas checks. Now I'm in for it. My pair of tens is looking worse by the minute. I check behind.
The river comes, the ten of hearts. Vegas checks again, settting his trap, except this time I can fight back. "I'm all-in."
Vegas looks at me and gives another wicked grin. He stands up from the table, pulls his pistol out from his holster, and pointing it at his own head says to me, "I raise you your life."
A lot of things went through my mind at that moment. My wife, my children, my future goals of saving enough money to move out west to california and strike it rich, but for some reason, I knew Vegas Black wasn't holding an ace.
"Vegas," I said, with shaky hands, pulling out my six-shooter from its brown leather holster, "you're a dead man." I pointed my six-shooter at my own head with my right hand, and flipped over K10 with the other. Vegas flipped over 88 and shot himself dead, in the middle of The Broken Spoke, on that hot and dry 1849 day in El Paso, when I made the biggest gamble of my life.
True story. No ban plz.
pretty awesome. ive been using the "i raise you your life" line ever since.
and not to go too long without posting awesome paint pictures heres a pretty cool one:
So my friend beth is a vegan, but she has a dog, Daniel, who is like this little hunter. He's killed squirrels, rabbits, woodchucks and even got a beaver once. Now being a vegan, Beth doesnt take kindly to the death of any animal, so she obviously goes apeshit whenever Daniel ends the life of a little woodland creature. So obviously I had to draw a picture about this:
As you can see shes pretty jacked so dont fuck with her. Or the dog for that matter.
I have pretty awesome tilt control. But it isnt all me. Whenever I get bad beat I throw up the following 2 videos.
The first one is the mangalore (from 5th element) version of Tony G yelling at ralph perry.
The bruce willis head on sammy farha kills me everytime, along with pretty much everything else in the video. Tony G better hope they dont see how he negotiates though.
The second video is a trailer for Saw 4. Pretty quick turn around by Jigsaw to be spitting out another movie so fast. Here you can see him at his finest:
If this trailer is any indication of the 4th movie, I'll be willing to wait outside the theater for a long time before to secure myself a ticket to opening night.
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