First off it is Losar today which is what we call Tibetan New Year, so my GF had the day off of work. She slept in while I did a coaching session and hooked a fish for a big win. Then she got up and we went on a hike in Boulder with a friend which was gorgeous. We brought the camera but of course forgot we had it, so no pics of the hike. But we did take pics at the tea house we went to after the hike which was fun. Came home and chilled for a bit, read all the funny commentary about how bobby jindal bombed, then played another session which went well. After that we got dressed up and went out for dinner and drinks. It's been a fun relaxing day. Even though it's a Wednesday it totally felt like a Saturday. This is why I want to play poker for a job - the freedom to just go where you want when you want, take a hike, visit a beautiful tea house, go out to dinner and so on.
A few pics:
Me in the tea house
Our friend Pani
Me and my GF
My Greek pizza
Fake Samosas
As for my first week of the NL200 shot, it's going well. Obviously it's going well as it has lasted a week, when usually it lasts a day or two and then I've lost 5 buyins and am on life tilt. I haven't run very well but I ran about even for a bit and that has allowed me to win 10 buyins. I'm playing a lot less hands than I usually would because I play 4-8 tables, usually 6, and pay much more attention and think much deeper. I get tired more quickly and sessions rarely last 500 hands. I also had trouble getting myself to play at first but it's getting easier and easier as I get more comfortable and the BR grows so I feel like I have more cushion.
I ran pretty horrible Monday night through yesterday. I overall ran bad at life yesterday... I felt like shit at work, tried some NL50 HU and ran 5 bi under EV cause flush draws vs me were the nuts. Came home and got coolered on NL200. Then I tried to play NES zelda and my GF helped me try to build a BR vs the money game man, and we managed to bust 5 bankrolls before quitting. I needed 160 to buy some a shield and medicine before beating the final dungeon, but didn't want to kill guys till I had that much so I got up to 20-40 each time and then the money game guy would own me. Then we wanted to get some wine to celebrate new years eve and I ran to the corner liquor store @ 11:50pm and it was fucking closed 10 minutes early! I went to the next closest one and got there @ 11:55pm and it was also closed! WTF!
So I was very happy to run good again today. Had my biggest day in a while and won nearly 5 buyins which ended up being $950. NL200 is the first limit where winning a couple buyins feels really really good cause it's solid money. At NL400 I think I'd pretty much cream my pants if I had a 20 bi month, lolz.
Graphs and stuff:
I might play more tonight and I bet if I do I will downswing and lose a bunch, hehe. At least I'm mentally prepared for it.
BR @ 7.8k. 10k is the goal for me to feel really comfortable hopefully I can keep running even or better for a few more days!
All that shit about playing NL50 HU and NL100 6max never came to fruition cause I didn't play anymore poker last night after finishing my blog and when I woke up this morning I did a coaching session where we played NL200. After the session was over I played a bit longer and killed a major donk and won about $500 off of him which completely erased my loses and brought me back to my BR peak of 7.4k. So I'll continue doing NL200.
Not much to say. I was running hot in the sense that I wasn't being coolered more than 1 time a session and I wasn't coolering anyone else for a few days. Then last night the poker gods decided to shit on me some more and in the last 1,000 hands of NL200 I've had 6 sick cooler/beats like flush over flush, KK losing to JJ and blah blah. No need to list specifics, we all know how it goes. Decided to play some NL50 HU since things weren't going so well at 6max and it was pretty hilarious. I got it AI on the flop 3 times vs 3 different people when I had TpTk or better and they had a flush draw, and all 3 hit their flush. lolz. It was pretty unbelievable to see it happen 3 times in a row, and of course after each time the guy who sucked out would leave the table asaply, hahaha.
I still am rolled for NL200 but no reason to play it while I'm running like shit, so I won't be playing anymore NL200 till the bad run is over. I figure NL50 HU and NL100 6max will be good enough for now. That's what I did earlier this month when none of my hands held up so I'll do it again =)
The only comforting thing is that I am playing really well @ NL200 and feel very comfortable in terms of skill. Just not totally comfortable in terms of BR. I think I'll need to hit at least 8k before I feel really solid and this type of BS won't bug me. I'd probably be creeping up on 9k right now if it wasn't for all the bad beats! odam.
So it's a very under EV month for me as you can see but somehow I've managed to win. I'd be a very happy panda if my dark green line and light green line were swapped =) The NL200 shot is going well so far but I'm a bit worried about how things will go starting Monday when the fish dry up. I've been able to do good table selection and find fish this weekend, but it will be back to a nitfest on Monday which is not appealing. My BR hit 7k tonight so that's nice, so I'm up 1.1k since starting NL200. I've done a little bit of NL100 in there too. Anyway here's how the month looks:
Feb so far:
Got over my fear and feel pretty good while playing NL200. Technically I'm running below EV but it feels like I'm running good cause in comparison to earlier this month where I couldn't win a single flip and was always sucked out on, this is like a heater. Let me run close to even and I can make money.
Also trying out tableninja which works pretty well. Only problem is that it lags a bit. It's kinda good cause I am only playing 6-8 tables and if I try to do more it will be too laggy. So it's like a deterent from mass tabling which is really good cause I'm at the point where I notice a huge drop in my game if I have more than 8 tables going. Finally I know enough things to look for and learn from hands I'm not in and have so many notes I like to take and use later that if I can't do those things I play much worse.
At least I'm up @ NL200 for the month. I started really badly on Feb 1st losing several buyins in bad beats so I was in the hole before this shot, but I've dug myslef out. Lifetime I'm still down quite a bit @ NL200 cause I have taken so many fucking shots at it, failed, and moved down to regrind. So it's gonna be a bit longer before I'm up @ NL200 lifetime.
The biggest thing is that it's harder to grind out a shit load of hands right now so it's gonna take me longer to get bonuses than I'd like... I was hopeful to buy another 1.5k bonus by the end of the month but I've got a lot of FPP left to go. But this is gonna be much better itlr and the VPP do come quicker @ Nl200, so as I get more used to the limit so that I can 8 table consistently and don't have fear holding me back and limiting the # of hands I play then I'll start building up FPP really fast.
I'm totally rambling. I guess that's ok since this is my blog! That's what blogs are for right?
I'm enjoying poker a lot right now and am excited to hit 10k, which is the BR I want before I will feel safe to make a living off of poker. Right now I'm working 2 days a week for a very small wage so poker is gonna be a major source of income going forward. I was looking and I've played a little over 600k hands lifetime. I really think there's a lot that you learn just by playing a lot of hands which can't be learned any other way. I don't know that much more about poker strategy now, I just understand it and can apply it so much better now. You also get to experience big heaters and big downswings and develop a much soberer view of what the long run really is. When I first moved to NL100 I heatered like crazy and had a 50 bi month and started taking NL200 shots after only like 20k hand of NL100, thinking I was so good. Once the heater ended I crashed hard and fell into a serious tilt. That was a dark time. Since then I've had some small heaters and other solid downswings and each one is easier to deal with. I know I will always have a hard time fighting the downswings and beats, but it's a lot easier now than it ever was before. There's a big difference between knowing what to do and actually doing it. I always knew what to do about downswings but had a hard time doing it - taking breaks, moving down sooner, staying in a good mind frame, blah blah.
Is it just me or did neilly fall off the map? He must be losing really badly or reverting to degen ways if he's gone this long without a blog update. What do you think happened?
Poll: What happened to neilly?
(Vote): Went Degen and Busted
(Vote): Is on a downswing and ashamed to blog
(Vote): life issues and he can't get to a computer
He looked like he was on track to follow real BR management for once and I was rooting for him. He was obviously on a heater and I don't think he realized it. The last post he made was about being on a downswing. I think he probably kept downswingin and either dropped to NL25 or even NL10 and that's why he's not posting. He was doing like 3 blog posts a day and suddenly goes like 6 days without a post... something must be up.
NL200 is fun when I'm online at the right time so that there are actually fish to bash. Kinda boring when it's a nitfest. Guess I gotta learn to whoop on bad regs now. Damn.
Overall still doing well despite running below EV on the NL200 shot. But I'm up so that's good. And by up I mean by 1 buyin. But that's fine cause the important thing is playing well and I think I've done that so far. All my AI loses have been coolers/suckouts so that's a good sign. Had a few spewy bluffs but I was smart enough to shut down on em before it was a disaster. I think they were ok spots to bluff but my reads on the players were wrong, so that makes em bad spots. But I'm learning how to handle people.
Great thing is that I've been able to maintain my play style. Usually when I do NL200 I start tightening up or doing stupid shit. So far this shot I've played like me, which is great. I spend a lot of time getting my head straight before I play because my biggest battle right now is a mental one.
Graph time!
NL200 Shot so far:
Feb so far:
Went out tonight before playing and had sushi at a friends house. My GF and I had a really good time and I didn't get to the tables till about 1am, which is fine cause they're juicy at that time on a Friday night. Tomorrow I'm gonna go see my dad and stay at his place for a few days and mass grind. Also gonna go with him to check out some real-estate (sp?). We're thinking of trying to buy some places to flip em. We'll see how that goes.
Overall life is quite good. I'm approaching NL200 in a sober way that I've never done before. I am confident in my game and am making sure to play in a good mindframe. I haven't played as much as I'd like but I think it's more important to be mentally sound while playing than to play more hands. Hopefully I will be able to continue playing NL200 and a heater will strike =)
God I felt like I played really good. Got over the fear and had a lot of fun. Exciting to be higher up and especially nice to feel like I am good enough to be there.
At least I'm used to this shit after the first half of the month where I ran crazily under expectation.
I hit 5.9k earlier today and took a while to get myself pumped up to do NL200. Wanted to wait for the evening when it would be easier to find fish. The only times I got stacked where when I got sucked out, so that's great. Will continue NL200 through the weekend and I'm gonna do a solid 10 BI shot. Gogo heater!
I've noticed that I get a weird sort of tilt going on when I'm winning. Not so much winning in a session, but when I've had several winning sessions in a row. I play a bit more apathetically, sometimes cautiously, but overall not as sharp. I also lose my drive. While losing I either get super driven to recover, or deeply discouraged and titly and angry. When I've been winning a lot I slack off and have less desire to play.
I think it happens because of a fear of losing. Things are going well and I am protecting my profits. I don't want to drop back down after finally recovering. This is especially bad right before reaching a goal. For example right now my big goal is to hit 6k. That has been a goal forever. But the closer I get the less I want to play. I get a weird feeling in my gut, kind of like butterflies but also kind of like someone is grabbing my guts and wringing them. I think this stems from the same fear of loss, fear of failure.
Weird. I've done a great job of learning how to deal with the more destructive forms of tilt - monkey tilt, robot tilt, downswing tilt - but this one I still have to work on. Hopefully now that I've recognized it and been honest with myself about what's going on, I will be able to deal with it. I need to teach myself that the risk is worth the reward, and that I will enjoy playing, cause I do. I have to remember that it's all about the long term and bankrolls fluctuate and are never at the same number for long, they always go up or down, but mine is more likely to go up cause I am a good player. So accept the fluctuations and have faith in the long term results and don't be affected.
I also need to set less goals. They are such a fuck up while playing poker since so much is out of our control.
So Obama just signed a new recovery/reinvestment bill for a bunch of money to try and get us outta this painful downswing. And what's one of the first thing he does? He launches a new website called http://www.recovery.gov/ where they're going to list all the money being spent, where it's going, when it is spent, how much is being spent, and so on. Pretty sweet if you ask me.
I'm sure cynics will find a way to berate this move as well, but to me this is more of Obama following through on what he talked about on the campaign - government transparency. And he's not just making some small token website that no one knows about. He blasted it out to his email list right away and is requesting everyone on the list to check the site constantly and to watch over the governments actions. It's a huge change from bush who always wanted americans to just go shopping and be lazy and don't worry about what the Gov is doing, we'll protect you, just forget about it, relax.... Obama is always asking Americans to get involved, work in their communities, hold the government accountable, share your stories, and so on.
I'm on the email list cause of the campaign, and I honestly figured that once the campaign was over the emails would stop. Not the case. They come in pretty consistently still and range from requests for me to organize service projects in my community to requests for me to share my story and suggestions requests for me to take part in holding government accountable. If you're not on the list you should join up just to see wtf Obama is up to, cause it's a very weird and different approach but very awesome imo.
So I saw the first episode of dollhouse was up on hulu, and being a firefly fan I figured I'd give joss my viewership. Sadly it was pretty crappy. I dun think I'll be watching it anymore. Anyone else seen it?
On another sad note, my favorite mouse of 5 years has started dying. It keeps randomly spazzing out and disconnecting. But my GF got me a new mouse as an early birthday present today so things are good. It's weird getting used to a new mouse - feel weird and awkward and slow and all that shit. But it's actually pretty nice. I like simple mice and I got one that was as close to my old one as possible. The scroll is annoying cause my old mouse would click and when I moved the wheel and that was great for knowing how many BB's I was adjusting the bet by, but this one is set up to be super smooth so I've gotta get used to how much I need to move it.
god I'm totally babbling.
Also had a funny day poker wise. Took a walk to get my head straight and came back to play about 1.3k hands that started poorly but broke even in the end, recovering from being down about 3.5 buyins. Then tonight while testing the new mouse I ran super hot for about 200 hands and won 2.5 buyins to put me in the green + 2 bi for the day. Creeping up on 6k. Hopefully this weekend will be the beginning of the big NL200 shot!
Contact Users: 760 Active, 0 Logged in - Time: 23:21
